Something new for me during this COVID-19 time is a memoir-writing course I'm taking via Zoom through Canadian Mennonite University's 55-Plus Enrichment Program, Xplore. The instructor is Larry Danielson; thirty seniors are participating, of whom I know seven personally!
Larry calls his course "Life Sentences." He deserves an A for that title, which is pretty clever! His wife Myra is also involved, helping to organize things. So he gets an A+ !
The first requirement for this course was to write a brief biography introducing ourselves to the class and to the instructor. Immediately there was a problem -- how does one summarize a life of seventy plus years in a few sentences? I wrote too much, I knew it was too much, but I checked with my copy-editor husband, and, yes, it was a bit long! So, reluctantly, I whittled it down to a few sentences and sent it off. Larry sent us copies of all the biographical blurbs. Every life is a story!
"Parents rarely let go of their children,
so children let go of them.
They move on. They move away.
The moments that used to define them are covered by
moments of their own accomplishments.
so children let go of them.
They move on. They move away.
The moments that used to define them are covered by
moments of their own accomplishments.
"It is not until much later,
that children understand;
their stories and all their accomplishments,
sit atop the stories of their mothers and fathers,
stones upon stones,
beneath the water of their lives."
Paulo Coelho
(Not sure why Dad isn't on the picture.)
I'm the taller girl, nine years old, at the top right beside my Mom.
Two more girls were born in Canada.
In 2009 I was finally at that point where I understood what Coelho so elegantly expresses in the poem above. Hardy and I went to Paraguay to attend the Mennonite World Conference. However, my main agenda was to go back to the place our family left when I was nine -- the village of Einlage in the Mennonite Colony of Neuland. I contacted former classmates who still lived there. Helga and her brother Gerhard were willing to take me where I wanted to go.
And so I went. And nothing was the same. Nothing the way I remembered it. The village was no longer there. The place where we lived was occupied but nothing about it was as I remembered it. I was profoundly disappointed.
We attended the conference after that. But I couldn't get over my disappointment. Browsing through a display, I came across a small green booklet. It was written in honour of the 25th anniversary of the founding of Neuland. I turned the pages. In it were all the stories written by the people who experienced what I remember as a child.
The place became alive once again, and I knew that I had not imagined what I remembered. I was happy to find the story of my father and another man beginning to establish a church in that wilderness.
I regained my equilibrium. That is the power of story-telling!
I knew I needed to harness that power in telling my own story. I began doing so by writing this blog. Posting once a month, eleven years later I have decided to write my story for my grandchildren! Writing it for them helps me get rid of the invisible critic always sitting on my shoulder telling me what I'm writing is not good enough, doesn't measure up. I am amazed at what my parents were able to endure and how courageous they were!
I'm writing the story by hand, actually printing it because my grandchildren don't read cursive. Our thirteen-year-old granddaughter, Anita's Lena Kate, designed a cover for the book and prints each chapter as I email it to her and the other grandchildren. She suggested that Opa write his story and designed a cover for him as well!
Lena Kate's book covers
Recently I got a call from a former client for whom I did some translating. As a young child she endured horrific abuse from a parent and has had recurring night terrors as a result. On the advice of her therapist, she began to write her night terrors in the form of a horror story ... and she no longer experiences these nightmares! She will be self-publishing the book in the near future with the help of our local McNally Robinson booksellers and is excited about doing so.
Writing can be therapeutic. It is that for me. It's about "finding peace within yourself and offering it to the world," as Mennonite poet Sarah Klassen said in an interview about her latest book of poetry, The Tree of Life.
Have you told your story?



Thank you for your next post. I like reading all of your blog posts. They have a soothing effect. You touch the forgotten strings. Warm greetings to you and Hardy - from Poland. Kasia from Gdansk
ReplyDeleteThank you, Kasia! Just hearing from you brings up wonderful memories of our Poland/Ukraine tour. Best tour guide, ever!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Elfrieda, for always reminding us the importance of story telling!
ReplyDeleteYou’re welcoming, and I guess I’ll keep telling! Can’t help it!
ReplyDeleteElfrieda, I applaud your writing of your own stories and sharing them with your children in a format they can enjoy. It's delightful that your granddaughter is so engaged in your stories that she's designing covers and creating books.
ReplyDeleteI have written my own 'everyday' stories, as you know. It was only in sharing those stories with others that I came to understand the importance of telling our stories. Even the simple stories shared can make a big difference.
So, keep writing. And keep encouraging others. You're doing great work.
Thank you, Carol, so nice to hear from you! I miss your blog posts, they always inspired me and encouraged me to start my own blog.
ReplyDeleteSo important to hear each other’s stories!!
ReplyDeleteKeep on sharing yours.
Thanks, Ruth. Wally’s written his story, you need to write yours too. Your grands will appreciate it and so will your kids. I’m at the point in mine where you have just appeared! Wait for the next episode!
ReplyDeleteYou mentioned standing on the shoulders of others. Now I see that your grandchildren are standing on your shoulders, making a sturdy pillar of remembrance.
ReplyDeleteWhat makes your memoir stories unique is the fact you are printing them for a unique audience, your descendants, and harnessing the artistic power of Lena Kate (and perhaps others) to make the book complete. Who knows, you audience will probably expand.
Yes, Hardy, you can write your story too. Long or short, it will be unique.
Cheera to "Life Sentences," Elfrieda!
Thanks, Marian, it’s good to feel the support of someone who has completed and published their memoir successfully. One stepping stone leads to another, so we’ll see where this takes me!
ReplyDeleteWriting is so very therapeutic and gives us readers a sense of profound empathy. How stories allow us to connect to one another is nothing short of miraculous. I heard the stories of Paraguay and my grandparents from my Dad and all of you but somehow reading the "Elly's World" stories allows it to deepen my understanding. Seeing it from Elly's perspective makes it even more salient and real. Thank you. I am forever grateful you have shared them with us too. To more "life sentences".
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Stacey, you are such an encouragement to me. It is so good to know someone is reading what I write and even finding some meaning in it! The writing is indeed therapeutic for me and I’m finding out things about myself that I didn’t know were there because they were hidden in my subconscious. Thinking and writing brings it to the surface in an amazing way!
ReplyDelete